"It's for your own protection"!!

This is a bit of a rant. All those who approve of and understand banks and their call centres, ignore me, I'm just a grumpy old woman.

Last Saturday, I tried to get money from an ATM with my A&L debit card. It was refused, but as these things are not unknown I didn't pay much attention, just used another card from a different bank. Yesterday the same card was again rejected, this time in the Co-op, so as I had to go to the town where the nearest branch is this morning I thought I would call in and get things sorted out.

After the cashier had passed the card through her machine and confirmed that it was blocked, she called the 'branch hotline', was put on hold for five minutes or so, then went through several minutes of security checks involving details from my driving licence and my account before being told that they were unable to deal with it in that department, and that she should call another (callcentre) number. The first attempt involved another long wait, with her explaining the problem then being told to hand the phone to me to answer about ten questions, including whether I had an overdraft facility (yes), details of any direct debits and the colour of my grandmother's eyes. Then I was told that they could not deal with this in that department and I should call again to ask for an advisor. At this stage I passed the phone back to the cashier, but she fared no better; the girl who had taken all the details attempted (possibly) to transfer the call, but failed.

The cashier tried again, with much the same results. By this time I had been in the branch for about 45 minutes and was getting a little frustrated. This time, however, the interrogator actually managed to put me through to an advisor. Who advised me that the card had been blocked because they had detected some unusual activity. Had I used the card at 9.58pm on 13th June to pay Kodak Galleries a very small sum? No, hardly, I was in or around the swimming pool at the local leisure centre at that time. Right then, that's it, the account is blocked, your card (and your husband's) are now dead and new ones will arrive in about ten days. In the meantime, should you need any money, you are to phone this number, pass through the security system (what colour were my grandmother's eyes?) tell them how much money I would like from which post office and then they would phone the PO and tell them to expect me and my cheque book. Or turn up at the branch with said cheque book and my driving licence or passport and they will phone the branch hotline for you and get authorisation to part with the cash. Could you possibly authorise them to give me some money now, as I have my cheque book etc with me and I've been through your security process three times already? Thought not.

After waiting another ten minutes or so for the branch hotline to answer so that the cashier could go through the rigmarole again and ask for some cash for me I gave up and went home penniless. I had been in there for well over an hour and had other things to do. I have to confess that I did express my dissatisfaction to the cashier, not with her but with the system, and even muttered darkly about closing accounts, etc.

On reflection, I suppose that some security is obviously necessary, and it was really rather clever of them to detect a fraudulent transaction, especially for a 'negligible sum', but what should theoretically be simple (phone up, get authorisation, carry on with a smile) falls down because the phones aren't answered quickly enough because the operators are taking too long asking too many security questions before they even know what the problem is and then not being able to transfer calls to the correct department or to an advisor who can actually advise. Which means that clients are then having to make more calls and go through it all again, thus clogging up the lines for the next customer in the queue. And it's no comfort to be told that these calls are all free so it doesn't matter; it does, my time matters. In the end today I left without completing the transaction because I had been in branch for 75 minutes and had other things to do. And I am retired, so my time is more my own than most people's.

It's no use complaining, either. After all, it is all for my protection!